Today I’ve got a great story for you. I’m sure that once you hear it, you’ll run to sign up for Smart Voting so that our hero here—and others like him—don’t get elected to parliament again.
This isn’t just a great story—it feels like it was lifted straight out of what is perhaps Russia’s most famous literary work: *The Master and Margarita*.
There’s an episode in it where Koroviev, a member of Satan’s retinue, amuses Margarita with all sorts of chatter, and when she marvels that an ordinary Moscow apartment can be made enormous inside by magic, he explains that something similar can be done even without magic:
In the end, that city resident got nowhere.
Now look at this. At first glance, this man may not have horns and hooves, but his luck with apartments is positively devilish. And his position fits too. This is Stepan Orlov, the leader of the United Russia faction in the Moscow City Duma.
He was elected from the Orekhovo-Borisovo North and South districts.
Stepan Orlov became a Moscow City Duma deputy at the age of 26. In 1997. More than 20 years ago. You may wonder how he got elected at such a young age back then. The explanation is funny too. Those were different times, and the heroes were different. Stepan Orlov was an aide to Irina Khakamada. He rode her popularity into office, though since then he has stopped being a democrat and become a United Russia boss—the faction leader.
He is also the head of the committee on municipal services and housing policy.
And it is precisely in housing policy that miracles seem to happen for him.
It’s 2007. Stepan is serving his third term as a deputy. He has an apartment on Krupskaya Street. 58 square meters. A perfectly ordinary apartment.
Deputy Stepan Orlov decides to improve his housing situation, and he SWAPS this apartment. He gives it to Moscow—that is, to the state, to us—and in return receives 166 square meters on Udaltsova Street from the city. He gave Moscow 58 square meters, and Moscow gave him three times as much. In the same area, but in a better building. Would you agree to a deal like that? Can you feel how close the characters from *The Master and Margarita* are to this transaction? But don’t worry, you’re safe—no one will offer you anything like this. You’re not a deputy.
It’s 2012. Deputy Stepan has spent five years living in his brand-new apartment, triple the size of the old one. And he feels it’s getting a bit cramped. So he swaps apartments again. Again with the city of Moscow.
And—amazingly—he returns a 160-square-meter apartment on Udaltsova Street to Moscow, and the city of Moscow (that is, you and me) gives him in return… TWO APARTMENTS. Only this time not in the southwest, but in the center, on Arbat. And not in some anonymous high-rise anthill, but in solid, prestigious apartments fit for a deputy.
So here’s the deal. Orlov’s apartment on Udaltsova Street. And two apartments in the “House on Kompozitorskaya” residential complex. Judging by the dates, Moscow City Hall specifically bought these two neighboring apartments in this elite complex in order to swap them with the wonderful Stepan. One apartment is 114 square meters, the other is 132 square meters. It’s easy to calculate that instead of 160 square meters, Orlov received 246. And not on the outskirts, but in central Moscow.
Isn’t it wonderful? After this, how can anyone not say that real life in Russia outdoes the fantasies in any book?
You and I are being robbed so elegantly that Bulgakov would die of delight hearing this story.
But it gets even better.
Let’s open the latest asset declaration of the United Russia faction leader.
We see his wife’s apartment—she calls herself Countess Orlova, by the way—on 1st Tverskaya-Yamskaya Street, 100 square meters. The second and third properties are the apartments he got in the swap on Arbat. That makes 350 square meters of personal housing. And on top of that, he also rents OFFICIAL HOUSING. Another 300 square meters.
So you and I swapped his 58 square meters on Krupskaya Street for 250 square meters on Arbat, and after that he still says to us: guys, I’ve got nowhere to live. Give me some official housing too. Okay. Here. Another 300 square meters.
Smart Voting, in the end, is simply a way to say “no” to schemes like this. Take part, if only to make your position clear: I don’t want to keep swapping apartments with these Stepans Orlovs. Because as a result of these swaps, his housing situation is excellent, while ours is terrible.
This whole United Russia machine is riding on our backs with its feet dangling. Bring as many people as possible to Smart Voting, especially if you’re from Orekhovo-Borisovo and your deputy is Stepan Orlov.