Finally got online. I’d been waiting for this moment to find out what interesting things were going on. It turned out that what’s going on is horror and mayhem. The poisonous seeds of anti-Caucasian xenophobia are producing their disgusting shoots all over the world. We all have to do something. Otherwise it will be too late. A Brazilian hacker has broken into the official website of the People’s Assembly of the Republic of Ingushetia. Shocking details here. Obviously, the criminals were trying to steal the recipe for cream-filled wafer rolls with sweetened condensed milk. And possibly some equally vital classified information about the industrial potential of the Republic of Ingushetia. We declare that the provocative actions of Brazilian chauvinists will not sow discord in the friendly family of the peoples of Russia. We call on the peoples of Russia to unite in the face of the threat posed by South American cyber-skinheads. We call on the Government of the Russian Federation to allocate an additional three billion rubles (about US$33 million) for the implementation of the “Electronic Ingushetia” program, which will make it possible to: significantly improve the “Congratulations on Kurban Bayram (Eid al-Adha)” section of the website; come up with a few more funny surnames for the “Outstanding Representatives of Ingushetia 2006” section (Bamatgirey Mankiev, Mukharbek Odzoyev, and Yagshimash Boratov are already there); use the computer program “Photoshop” to increase the fluffiness of the mustaches of all citizens featured in the “Faces of Ingushetia” section by 30%; draw small funny donkeys in various sections of the site to create a cheerful, relaxed atmosphere for visitors to the webpage.
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