My Response to Vladimir Putin: On Being Constructive

Once again, journalists played a game with

Vladimir Putin: the game called "Say the Name."

They've been trying for several years now to get him to say

Navalny's last name, but so far they still haven't

gotten any further than "this gentleman"

or "the convicted individual." Wherever this

gentleman appears, he is always somehow

"keeping an eye on things," as we say, but

there is always some kind of problem trailing behind him,

always some kind of issue. And so, another

attempt was made on Saturday at the

G20 summit, but unfortunately it once again

came to nothing. In response to the question,

"Why do you never mention

Navalny by name?" Putin still somehow

managed not to utter that dreadful

word. But the most interesting part was that he explained

what exactly he dislikes so much about our

election campaign. "I believe we

can have a dialogue, especially at a level

such as the presidential or

government level, with people

who offer a constructive

agenda, even if it is critical in nature.

"But if the point is only

to attract attention to oneself, then that is

not interesting for

dialogue; there is no constructiveness." So that's

what it turns out to be about, and apparently that's the source of all our troubles. Now

it's clear: a volunteer walks down the street handing out

our leaflets, and then the police swoop in: bang!

"Citizen Constructiveness, show us your papers. No

constructiveness? Then come with us." Or

take these campaign balloons, for example. Just look:

not a single word of constructiveness, not

one. But they could at least have written in tiny

letters, "Glory to the Great Putin,"

or "Putin

2048." But no, nothing of the sort. So naturally

the proper place for such a balloon is

the police station, where it will be

written up for ignoring

the constructive agenda. But look at this

instead. What are they being detained for?

Comrade, state your post.

And your ID, we need that. You are obliged

to identify yourselves to us. Maybe you're just

some kind of, I don't know, bandits. "Yes, yes, we are

terrorists." Hi, friends. My name is

Augusta. Today I was one of the first

to be detained. It's just disgusting,

really disgusting. They shove you into a police van, and

then go on, say something constructive through

that iron door. What are you doing in there, con-

Show your documents. Why are you detaining me?

Well, that's not constructive in the slightest.

Come on, whisper quietly through

the keyhole: "Comrade police officers, I

support the re-election of Vladimir

Vladimirovich Putin for another term

because 18 years is not enough for him. I want him

to stay in power for 24 years." And then, like in a

children's book, a smiling police officer

will open the door for you and say, "Well,

finally, some constructiveness. Now I

love you. Now I really do.

Yes, we have utterly failed

the constructiveness competition, because

we're not even trying. But we should try;

we should take our cues from the masters.

Just look: Vladimir

Solovyov took an image from that same

summit and neatly pasted Putin onto it,

then posted it on Twitter with the caption, "Better

than a thousand words." Beautiful, and constructive too.

We'll never manage that, so of course

it was only right that all weekend the Moscow

police were occupied solely with

hunting down our non-constructive people. Just think: over

the course of a weekend in Moscow, on average, there are

only 533 thefts, 40 robberies,

eight violent assaults, and three murders.

Why should the police waste time on

that nonsense when, look at these

criminal-looking faces: they roam around

the city, they hand out leaflets, they

campaign, confuse citizens, argue with

television. Outrageous. Of course, in the

run-up to the presidential election,

police officers should not behave like this:

"Andryukha, we've got a possible crime scene there—

go—"

"What do you mean, Andryukha? We've got a balloon here, possibly

for Navalny. Move out, now, otherwise

something terrible might happen." And these very

frightful people, these volunteers with leaflets—

it's you who have no constructiveness, not

us. Because our demands to you, to

your family, and to your inner circle are:

stop stealing. That's extremely constructive,

because corruption hinders

economic growth, corruption makes

reforms impossible, corruption simply, well,

reduces people's wages. We propose

putting on trial

officials who cannot explain

the sources and origins of their

wealth. This works in all countries, and

it is highly constructive. We propose

judicial reform that will make judges

independent and the courts honest. In my

view, that is quite a constructive

proposal, isn't it? We are proposing

that Russia follow the path of rich, developed countries and

set the minimum wage in Russia

at 25,000 rubles (about $420 at the time). Very constructive,

well thought out, and based on international experience. But

what exactly don't you like about that? We live in an era

when countries become rich not

through oil and gas, but through people, through

human capital. And so yes, we

propose doubling spending

on healthcare and education, which

you are constantly cutting. And the money for

that exists; it just needs to be reallocated from

the insanely bloated police budget,

which you keep increasing simply

to protect your regime. And that is

Look at how constructive any

poll shows that more than 70% of citizens

support direct elections for mayors and

governors. And this is part of our program

a very constructive part, and it is you

Mr. Putin, together with your half-defeated

United Russia, who are acting absolutely

unconstructively regarding elections across the country

Despite the fact that Russian citizens

are categorically against this. Therefore

Dear Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin

Go to

8.com and you will see that our approach

is more specific: a rebound into positive territory, followed by

growth and a way out of today's situation

is inevitable

we do not believe it, because this is very

unconstructive. Think about it and

be sure to subscribe to our channel

because here they tell the truth, unlike

your deceitful

unconstructive

vision