Want a laugh? Remember when Putin flew his ambition-plane?
A wonderful photo op, great entertainment for someone with plenty of money and free time. The only snag is that unauthorized persons are strictly forbidden from being in an aircraft cockpit, let alone operating the aircraft. That is how air disasters happen, and there have been several in recent years. Citizen V. V. Putin quite clearly does not have the certification to operate this type of aircraft. A serious offense, punishable by a fine. At the time, I suggested we have a little fun by filing complaints with various agencies, including Rosaviatsiya (Russia’s Federal Air Transport Agency), just to watch them twist themselves into knots. They have absolutely no chance of proving to us that no violation took place. And of course, it is extremely awkward for them to try fining Mr. Putin and the organizers of the photo shoot. Just as I expected, the snakes in the frying pan are wriggling very amusingly. First, as we remember, Rosaviatsiya said, "This is not within our jurisdiction":
We complained to the prosecutor’s office, because under the law, citizens are not required to figure out which agency is responsible for what; government bodies are supposed to determine that themselves and forward the letters accordingly. The prosecutor’s office agreed that we were right and forced Rosaviatsiya to respond again:
And respond Rosaviatsiya did. This reply deserves a prize in the competition for "the most pathetic attempt to cover your own ass":
So Mr. Putin flying a plane has been recognized as a phenomenon "so multifaceted in nature" that Rosaviatsiya cannot determine which state authority is supposed to deal with the matter. In other words, just think about this for a second: THE FEDERAL AIR TRANSPORT AGENCY OF THE RUSSIAN FEDERATION does not know which body is authorized to regulate state aviation. Isn’t that marvelous? In a country where everything is regulated, right down to the size of anthills and the width of the stripes on a chipmunk’s back, enormous aircraft are flying around, piloted by who-knows-who, and nobody knows who is responsible for it. It almost seems as if Mr. Putin was flying a UFO. These are exactly the moments that make me love my job. Pure poking-with-a-sharp-stick. Nonsense, of course, and a small thing, but satisfying. I can just imagine how long all of Rosaviatsiya spent painfully coordinating and editing this letter. *- What if something goes wrong... What if it causes an uproar... We won’t get a pat on the head for this... Just give those people on the internet a reason to sneer... *And yet after all that collective effort, they still put out some comical little sheet about "issues of a multifaceted nature" and "it is not possible to determine." Of course we’ll go to court. We’ll continue the educational exercises. It’s even interesting to see what excuses they come up with. I wouldn’t rule out their saying that Rosaviatsiya regulates only the flights of herons and thrushes, and everything else is simply too "multifaceted" for it.